Personal Finance

I’m 40 with a net worth of $8.5 million and want to retire early but my in-laws think it’s immoral - what should I do?

Marc Guberti

Published: January 11, 2025 10:39 am

Last Updated: January 12, 2025 8:53 am

A Redditor has worked hard to amass an $8.5 million fortune at 40 years old. He also has a $4 million property with a $500,000 mortgage and a rental property as well. He is feeling burned out at work and wants to retire once he reaches a net worth of $10 million. He expects to earn $1.5-$2.0 million over the next two years.

While retirement is financially feasible, the Redditor’s spouse and the in-laws believe that retiring early is immoral. This stance is partially inspired by the father’s background of starting with nothing and accumulating $20 million with his business. The spouse wants to get into the father’s business, while the Redditor doesn’t want to be involved.

He shared the details in this Reddit post. I’ll share some thoughts, but it is always good to speak with a financial advisor if you can.

Money Doesn’t Seem to Be the Issue

We don’t have all of the details in this post, but it’s safe to assume money isn’t the issue. The Redditor has an $8.5 million net worth, and a 4% withdrawal results in $340,000 per year before taxes. While the Redditor’s spouse has mentioned that it’s possible that the market crashes, a 50% drop still leaves a $4.25 million portfolio. It’s also possible for the portfolio to continue growing over time.

The spouse also earns a lot of money — $250k-$300k per year–but also feels burned out at her job. She eventually wants to go into the family business, and it’s possible that the wife doesn’t have any brothers or sisters. In other words, she’s the only family member who can keep the business running after her parents pass on the mantle.

The couple can also consider moving to an area with a lower cost of living to stretch their cash even more. However, this scenario seems highly unlikely due to the family business. The spouse isn’t likely to relocate to an area that’s away from her parents, and the business may be a local one, meaning they’re committed to the company’s location.

The Couple Can Work at Jobs with More Flexibility

A good compromise can be the couple working more flexible jobs instead of opting for careers that overwork them. They have the financial flexibility to make that type of decision, and it wouldn’t represent a complete exit from the workforce.

Part-time or remote work can be viable solutions. This route will likely result in a lower income, but this path can reduce stress and still give the couple things to do. The couple may want to consider joining local groups in their area based on their hobbies. Doing that can help them gauge what life can be like if they don’t work as often.

Plan Out What Life Could Look Like

The Redditor knows he can FIRE, but the spouse doesn’t want them to stop working. It’s possible that she’s thinking about what they can lose from walking away from their jobs without thinking about what they can gain.

Retirement makes it easier for the couple to go on vacations, spend more time with loved ones, and enjoy a slower pace of life. It sounds like they are both burned out and need better schedules. One Redditor commented on the post and recommended that the couple read the book Die With Zero. The book is a fan favorite among the Chubby FIRE and Fat FIRE subreddit groups.

Ask your wife what she would want to do more of if work wasn’t an obstacle, and help her envision a dream life outside of long hours. Even with this exercise, you don’t have to retire right away. While the couple could retire right away, opting for more flexible jobs can be the best of both worlds. Everyone’s still working, which will keep the spouse and her parents happy, while a better work-life balance can make the husband feel happier as well.