Personal Finance

I Retired Early at 44 but Now All My Friends Have Families and I Feel All Alone

Couple saving money in piggybank
Ridofranz / iStock via Getty Images

24/7 Wall St. Key Points:

  • A Reddit user is upset that he spent his youth working to become financially independent.

  • He now has money, freedom, and flexibility but he isn’t enjoying life as everyone around him is busy with work and kids.

  • It’s important to find a balance as you work and save money so you can enjoy life now and in the future.

  • 4 million Americans are set to retire this year. If you want to join them, click here now to see if you’re behind, or ahead. It only takes a minute. (Sponsor)

A Reddit user has achieved financial independence and is ready to retire rich at 44. While you would think that this is likely to make him happy, the reality is that he is actually really dissatisfied with his life and wishes he could go back and make different choices.

Here’s why the original poster (OP) is so dissatisfied with his situation, along with some tips on what the Redditor can do and how others can avoid his fate. 

Financial independence isn’t the key to happiness

The OP had a simple reason that he’s unhappy with the current state of his life — even though he has financial freedom and is free of money worries.

He said that most of his friends are now tied down with kids and work. His parents and other family members are getting old and are infirm, and others in his life are busy with their families and no longer looking for adventure. He also said he is not as physically fit or as capable of doing things as he used to be.

He regrets the fact that he front-loaded all of his work during the “best years” of his life in order to get rich and have flexibility later when “flexibility has less to offer,” and he said he would give back all the money and independence in order to go back to being in his early or mid 30’s and living with roommates when he was happier. 

Unfortunately, this is a tough place to be in because the OP had a vision of his life that did not pan out. At the same time, though, he is only 44 years old and he does have financial independence so he has the opportunity to cultivate the life that he wants. He can travel, make friends, start a business despite not needing the money, or try to find a like-minded community who also retired at a young age and who is looking for more out of life. 

While he may wish he’d done things differently earlier and found a better balance, he can still change course — and obviously, he should since he’s dissatisfied. The good thing is, he has the money to do that because he saved and invested earlier in life so that will make it easier to pursue those options that might bring him joy. 

It’s important to find a good balance

Young Asian woman making stack of coin. invest save finance concept, saving money, investment
Natee Meepian / Shutterstock.com

The OP also had another important point to make beyond the fact that he wishes his life was different now. He also said that he regretted sacrificing so much time and energy at a young age to achieve financial independence by mid-life. 

The reality is that it is smart to begin investing as soon as you can. If you start saving and you put in the work to earn extra money when you are young and just getting started, you can make the power of compound interest work for you. You can also invest a lot before you make big lifestyle commitments that make saving harder. Starting young and investing aggressively is one of the best and fastest ways to grow rich.

At the same time, you don’t want to sacrifice so much that you don’t enjoy life and that you end up with regrets. No one has any guarantees of a healthy future so you can and should do things that bring you joy even as you try to save.

The good news is, you can find a happy medium. You can pay for experiences, for example, but wait to buy the big fancy house or luxury car until after you’ve invested. Or you can decide on one great splurge purchase that really excites you but sacrifice in other ways. If you prioritize savings but also spend money throughout your life on things you value, you can enjoy all the years of your life — which being free of financial worries will help you to do. 

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