My Sister Wants a Share of My $4 Million Retirement, What Are My Options?

Parents don’t always treat their children fairly. A parent might give one child a 10:00 PM curfew and impose a 9:00 PM curfew on their sibling.

A parent might also treat their children different financially — for example, send one to a more expensive college or support one child more in adulthood than another.

This isn’t always the best thing, because it can lead to serious animosity among siblings. And it can be painful for a parent to see that.

But here, we have a situation where a parent has set his children up to have conflict with one another. And now, he’s not around to see it.

When siblings are kept in the dark

Recently, a caller asked Dave Ramsey for advice on what to do with a $4 million inheritance from his father. While he received a generous payday, his sister got nothing.

Not surprisingly, the sister did not take the news well. And she’s been trying to guilt the caller into sharing the money.

Ramsey was quick to tell the caller that the situation at hand is not his fault, and that he has no obligation to share the inheritance — at least not legally. But morally, it’s a different story.

It would be one thing if the father expressly stated that he didn’t want the sister to inherit money. But that doesn’t seem to be the case here.

Rather, it seems like the son who got the inheritance lucked out and the sister was left out in the cold. So while the caller certainly doesn’t have to share the wealth, he may want to if he can afford to — especially if he has a good relationship with his sister and cares about her financial wellbeing.

This doesn’t mean that he has to split the inheritance evenly. The money is his, after all. But since he’s looking at a very large sum of money, he can probably afford to hook his sister up with a decent chunk and still be very secure for the rest of his life if he manages his money well.

It’s best to get things out in the open

The sibling who inherited the large sum of money isn’t to blame for the way things went down in this situation. Rather, the father is to blame.

It’s very odd that the father didn’t engage his family in an open conversation about who would inherit his assets. But since that didn’t happen, now everyone else is in a tough position.

If you have money you intend for your children to inherit, it’s best to share your plans with them so they know what to expect. And if that inheritance won’t be even, then it’s a good idea to disclose that ahead of time and explain why. That way, you won’t risk a situation where one sibling is angry with the other or harbors resentment.

If you’re not sure how to start estate planning, you can talk to a financial advisor as well as an estate planning attorney. They can walk you through options that allow you to leave a legacy behind in the most tax-efficient manner possible.