One of the most challenging conversations any parent can have with their child is what happens after they are gone. It’s a horrible thing to think about and an even more difficult to discuss, but it does have to happen at some point so everyone is on the same page about health and finances.
In the case of one Redditor, this conversation turned out to be an eye-opening experience when they learned their parents had a $2-3 million net worth. As a result, they and their siblings are now in a position where they have to consider what could happen if they receive a windfall amount of money.
It’s tough to have this conversation with family, but learning about an inheritance out of nowhere is not a surprise you want, even if it’s a good thing and helps you live a more comfortable life.
The Situation
Posting in r/RedditForGrownups, this Redditor is undoubtedly feeling a bit selfish about not having to worry about money someday. Coming from a Korean middle-class background, the original poster’s parents are now retired, which led to a discussion with their children about having a net worth between $2 and $3 million.
The Redditor feels a bit of shock about never knowing this before, especially after they respond in the comments that their parents’ combined salary while working only put them in the top 30% of earners in the United States. According to a recent report, if you are in the top 30% of US income, the parents likely had a combined income of somewhere around $127,300. This seems like the most shocking moment for Redditor, as they never knew their parents had this wealth.
Funnily enough, Redditors up and down the comments poke fun at the idea that the original poster calls his parents “middle class” with a $3 million net worth. According to various online sources, at this net worth, the parents are more likely upper middle class, if not close to the upper class.
Ultimately, the Redditor’s biggest concern isn’t that they still have to treat their lives as if they were earning every penny, but that they now wish they had some assurance they wouldn’t live the rest of their days with financial worry.
What To Do Next
To be completely honest, there isn’t much this Redditor can or should do in the meantime other than live their life. Until they have inheritance money in a bank account, they can’t act as if this is guaranteed and slow down in any way.
This Reddit thread and countless others are full of people who thought they would get big inheritances, only to end up with nothing or less than nothing. The reality is that one of these parents (or both) could get sick, require long-term care, and, poof, the inheritance is gone. Obviously, this isn’t the hope, but it’s a definite possibility and something that happens time and time again.
Other Redditors empathize with the original poster’s situation of being completely unaware, but this empathy only goes so far. In the real world, it’s not unheard of for parents to hide their wealth so that their kids don’t feel spoiled or as if they can just wait for money.
In fact, the parents are probably doing the original poster a favor by not telling them up to this point. The hope is that the original poster has started to build a life independently and won’t need this money to get by. While the Redditor certainly indicates they don’t want to live under financial worry, we don’t know if they are going to get married, find a better job, and or be able to earn enough to live the life they want well before the parents pass away and potentially leave them and their siblings some inheritance.
The 7 Step Inheritance Checklist Before The Money Arrives
If you are fortunate enough to be in a similar situation in the future, here are 7 steps you should take before the money arrives to ensure a smoother transition for all parties.
- Start the talk now. Use neutral openers like “Can we review your estate documents together so I understand your wishes?”
- Map potential taxes. Gifts above $18,000 per donor (2024) trigger Form 709 filing; large estates face 40 % federal tax past $13.61 M (Source: IRS).
- Stress-test long-term-care costs. A private-room nursing-home stay now averages $108K/year. One illness can eat a seven-figure estate.
- Update your own plan. Receive assets? Re-write your will, beneficiary forms, and umbrella insurance within 90 days.
- Practice “as-if” budgeting. CFP Board suggests living on current income so future wealth amplifies—not replaces—good habits.
- Consider a disclaimer trust. If siblings differ in need or estate size grows, disclaimers let heirs redirect wealth tax-efficiently.
- Hire fiduciary help. Interview at least two fee-only CFP® pros; insist on a written fiduciary oath.
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