Among the things that can cause the biggest blowouts among family members, inheritance is at or near the top of any list. As soon as money gets involved, any sense of reasoning goes right out the window as everyone immediately starts to see dollar signs.
This is exactly what one Redditor posting in r/inheritance is learning firsthand as his wife struggles to navigate an inheritance. With the recent death of the Redditor’s wife’s grandmother, she was left some money, but her father, the executor, is being difficult about giving the money away.
The Money Grab
To add a little more color to this situation, the Redditor’s wife hasn’t always had a good relationship with her father or grandmother. Following the grandmother’s recent passing, the father’s true nature is once again on display. Even after the father tried to convince his mother to remove his daughter from the will, it didn’t happen.
As a result, the father has now unilaterally decided, as the executor of the estate, that he wants to put the money in a trust for the Redditor’s son. Unfortunately, because of the father’s attitude about this whole thing, they don’t even know how much money is being discussed.
The father called his daughter, asking for her bank information to open a trust, which she wasn’t willing to provide. She did offer to give it to the lawyer handling the estate if they called and had a discussion about what was taking place. In yet another unsurprising move, the father stated that he didn’t want the lawyer to contact him and would instead divide the money among other inheritors.
So, we’re left with a question as to whether the father can really refuse the wishes of the will and estate.
The Father’s New Reality
The Redditor did call probate court to see if any will had been filed, so we can cross that off the list. However, as other Redditors quickly point out in the comments, what this father is doing is totally wrong. He is legally bound to follow the deceased’s direction, and refusing to do so would be illegal and put him in a precarious legal situation.
Not only must the father be act legally, but he also must be transparent about what is going on. One Redditor suggests calling the father and asking him if he is clear about his fiduciary duties. Another alternative is to try and find the name of the attorney handling this matter and inform the attorney of the father’s threats.
More importantly, if the Redditor and his wife want to set up a trust for the son, that is something they can do on their own. There is absolutely no reason for the father to think this is something he has the power to do with someone else’s money. At the very least, this family needs a copy of the will.
The Next Steps
The good news is that the Redditor has already checked probate, but now it’s time to take this a step further and contact a probate attorney. Even if it’s just a free consultation, the Redditor and his wife need to understand their legal rights regarding the inheritance.
At the same time, they should also document everything the father has said, down to the letter. This includes whether it was via a phone call, text, or email, as well as the date and time it happened. There should be a clear record of everything that transpired, as it appears that this situation will involve further legal discussions.
Alternatively, the Redditor’s wife can propose mediation with her father, although it’s likely this would be ignored. The good news is that this overture would enable a bipartisan third party to resolve the dispute without resorting to legal action.
If the father does give away the daughter’s money, she should immediately hire an attorney. Refusing to follow the court’s orders would put the father at risk, and it would likely result in a clear-cut case in favor of the daughter receiving her portion of the assets. The daughter should also look into any state laws regarding this matter, as individual states have varying legal language on how to handle these situations.
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