A mother of two called into The Ramsey Show with a dilemma. She and her husband had finished the show’s suggested Baby Steps for financial freedom three years earlier. They owed only $160,000 on a home worth about $630,000 on eight acres, with no other debt and a full emergency fund. “We were doubling our mortgage to kind of mimic a 15-year mortgage because we had already signed the 30-year,” she explained, putting them on track to pay off in 5 to 7 years.
But now she wants to leave her job, giving up $3,000 to $4,000 per month, to homeschool the kids. Her husband earns $8,000 to $10,000 monthly. “It’s disappointing when we went from possibly paying off [the mortgage] in 5 to 7 years to now we can’t pay it off for like 22 years,” she said.
Co-host Jade Warshaw immediately questioned the 22-year timeline. “I don’t think it’s gonna be 22 years. Have you put it in a calculator?” she asked. “You’ve been paying on it like it was a 15,” co-host John Delony added. “You’ve paid it way down.”
Look at the household budget the way Warshaw framed it. Even after she stops working, the family will be left with a monthly income exceeding the median U.S. household. Plus, they own a mid-six-figure house with roughly a quarter of the original mortgage left and zero consumer debt. Warshaw suggested they keep funding Baby Step 4 (15% of gross income into retirement), set aside something for the kids’ college, and put whatever remains on the mortgage, even if it is less than before. That sequence produces a slower payoff than the original plan, but probably won’t take 22 years.
“You’re grieving a reality that was never a reality,” Delony said. “It was a story.” The family prioritized paying down the mortgage but now wants to prioritize the children’s education. “That’s a choice y’all made, and it’s disappointing” it will take longer to pay off the mortgage, Delony said. “We’re going to grieve the fact that, man, we thought we’re gonna have this thing knocked out in 5 years. Cool, we’re not. We’re gonna spend extra time with our kids, and we’re gonna get this thing done in 10 years, right?”
The host gave the caller a pep talk. “Y’all have worked your butts off for a long time to get into the exact situation you’re in right now,” he said. “Y’all have a more than half a million dollar house and you have $160 grand left on it. You don’t owe anybody anything. Y’all are winning all across the board.”
Delony also advised against either-or thinking. “Whenever me or my wife or both of us feel hemmed in by an either-or decision, … [we] throw on the table 5 or 10 random other ideas,” he said. “I want y’all to do this exercise cuz it will remind you that y’all are free. Y’all are in the driver’s seat and you’re not in [a] dire situation.”
What the Couple Should Do
- Run the real payoff number. Pull the current mortgage balance and rate, then use any standard amortization calculator. Test three scenarios: minimum payment only, current accelerated payment, and a middle number you can sustain on one income.
- Rebuild the monthly budget on the surviving income. Subtract taxes, retirement contributions at 15% of gross, a college fund, fixed expenses, and groceries. What remains is your capacity to pay extra on the mortgage.
- Stress test the emergency fund. On one income, three months of expenses is thinner than it looks. Six months would be a safer threshold.
- Brainstorm the third option. Delony pushed the caller to throw “5 or 10 random other ideas” on the table rather than choosing between full-time work and zero income. Part-time, contract, or seasonal work can preserve retirement contributions and shorten the mortgage timeline without giving up homeschooling.
“I hate to say it like this, but this is what freedom looks like,” Delony said. “You get to make choices, and you still have to own the choices that you make.”
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